dear john

i spent this semester wandering in a fog
with only one desire—escape.
then you—
warmth and joy, comfort and ease,
the most perfect evening.
words flowed like honey,
gentle and sweet,
moving slowly but with substance,
with meaning.
and there was you—
that smile (i can't feel my legs),
breath caught in my throat.
please don't end.
don't let this night be over.
i never want to leave.
tonight the clocks are my enemy
taking up arms against me
as the seconds fly by.
and tonight, so is my fear.
i wish i could ask you to stay.
to hold me as i sleep,
quiet and warm, innocent and secure.
but the words don't come out
because i don't know what to say
and i don't know what you'd say
and as we walk to the door,
my regrets begin to knock.
i can't believe i let this happen
i wish i could stay just for you
because g—d only knows when,
if, i'll ever meet someone like you again.
and as those fears crossed my eyes
you moved close

and kissed me.